Interests
You could have heard a pin drop
When in England, at a fairly large
conference, Condi Rice was asked by
the Archbishop of Canterbury if our plans
for Iraq were just an example
of empire building' by George Bush.
She answered by saying, 'Over the years, the
United States has sent many
of its fine young men and women into great
peril to fight for freedom beyond
our borders.
The only amount of land we
have ever asked for in return
is enough to bury those that did not
return.
'
You could have heard a pin drop.
~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~
There was a conference in France where a
number of international engineers
were taking part, including French and
American.
During a break, one of the
French engineers came back into the room
saying 'Have you heard the latest
dumb stunt Bush has done? He has sent an
aircraft carrier to Indonesia to help
the tsunami victims.
What does he intended
to do, bomb them?'
A Boeing engineer stood up and replied
quietly: 'Our carriers have three hospitals
on board that can treat several hundred
people; they are nuclear powered and
can supply emergency electrical power to
shore facilities; they have three cafeterias
with the capacity to feed 3,000 people
three meals a day, they can produce several
thousand gallons of fresh water from sea
water each day, and they carry half a
dozen helicopters for use in transporting
victims and injured to and from their flight
deck.
We have eleven such ships; how many
does France have?'
You could have heard a pin drop.
~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~
A U.S.
Navy Admiral was attending a naval
conference that included Admirals
from the U.S.
, English, Canadian,
Australian and French Navies.
At a cocktail
reception, he found himself standing with
a large group of Officers that included
personnel from most of those countries.
Everyone was chatting away in English
as they sipped their drinks but a French
admiral suddenly complained that,
whereas Europeans learn many languages,
Americans learn only English.
' He then
asked, 'Why is it that we always have to
speak English in these conferences rather
than speaking French?' Without
hesitating, the American Admiral replied 'Maybe
it's because the Brits, Canadians, Aussies
and Americans arranged it so you
wouldn't have to speak German.
'
You could have heard a pin drop.
~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~
AND THIS STORY FITS RIGHT IN WITH THE
ABOVE...
Robert Whiting, an elderly gentleman of 83,
arrived in Paris by plane.
At French
Customs, he took a few minutes to locate
his passport in his carry on.
'You have
been to France before, monsieur?' the
customs officer asked sarcastically.
Mr.
Whiting admitted that he had been to
France previously.
Then you should
know enough to have your passport ready.
'
The American said, ''The last time I was
here, I didn't have to show it. 'Impossible.
Americans always have to show your
passports on ar! rival in France!' The American
senior gave the Frenchman a long hard
look.
Then he quietly explained, ''Well,
when I came ashore at Omaha Beach on D-Day
in 1944 to help liberate this country,
I couldn't find a single Frenchmen to show
a passport to.
'
You could have heard a pin drop
Bill Cosby has a great way of "distilling" things. Looks like he's done it again!
AMERICA NEEDS A CANDIDATE WITH THIS PLATFORM!!
I HAVE DECIDED TO BECOME A WRITE-IN CANDIDATE FOR PRESIDENT IN THE YEAR 2016.
HERE IS MY PLATFORM:
(1). Any use of the phrase: 'Press 1 for English' is immediately banned. English is the official language; speak it or wait outside of our borders until you can.
(2). We will immediately go into a two year isolationist attitude in order to straighten out the greedy big business posture in this country. America will allow NO imports, and
we'll do no exports. We will use the 'Wal-Mart's policy, 'If we ain't got it, you don't need it.' We'll make it here and sell it here!
(3). When imports are allowed, there will be a 100% import tax on it coming in here.
(4). All retired military personnel will be required to man one of the many observation towers located on the southern border of the United States (six month tour). They will be under strict orders not to fire on SOUTHBOUND aliens.
(5). Social Security will immediately return to its original state. If you didn't put nuttin in, you ain't gettin nuttin out. Neither the President nor any other politician will be
able to touch it.
(6). Welfare. -- Checks will be handed out on Fridays, at the end of the 40 hour school week, the successful completion of a urinalysis test for drugs, and passing grades.
(7). Professional Athletes -- Steroids? The FIRST time you check positive you're banned from sports ... for life.
(8).. Crime - We will adopt the Turkish method, i.e., the first time you steal, you lose your right hand. There is no more 'life sentences'. If convicted of murder, you will be
put to death by the same method you chose for the victim you killed; gun, knife, strangulation, etc.
(9).. One export of ours will be allowed: wheat; because, the world needs to eat. However, a bushel of wheat will be the exact price of a barrel of oil.
(10). All foreign aid, using American taxpayer money, will immediately cease and the saved money will help to pay off the national debt and, ultimately, lower taxes. When disasters occur around the world, we'll ask The American People if they want to donate to a
disaster fund, and each citizen can make the decision as to whether, or
not, it's a worthy cause.
(11). The Pledge of Allegiance will be said every day at school and every day in Congress.
(12). The National Anthem will be played at all appropriate ceremonies, sporting events, outings, etc.
My apology is offered if I've stepped on anyone's toes ..... nevertheless......
GOD BLESS AMERICA.
Sincerely, Bill Cosby
Idols
Robin Williams....10 More Truths
1) 'The US will apologize to the world for our 'interference' in their affairs, past &; present. You know, Hitler, Mussolini, Stalin, Tojo, Noriega, Milosevic, Hussein, and the rest of those 'good 'ole' boys', we will never 'interfere' again.
2) We will withdraw our troops from all over the world, starting with Germany, South Korea, the Middle East, and the Philippines. They don't want us there. We would station troops at our borders. No one allowed sneaking through holes in the fence.
3) All illegal aliens have 90 days to get their affairs together and leave.We'll give them a free trip home. After 90 days the remainder will be gathered up and deported immediately, regardless of whom or where they are. They're illegal!!! France will welcome them.
4) All future visitors will be thoroughly checked and limited to 90 days unless given a special permit!! No one from a terrorist nation will be allowed in. If you don't like it there, change it yourself and don't hide here. Asylum would never be available to anyone. We don't need any more cab drivers or 7-11 cashiers.
5) No foreign 'students' over age 21. The older ones are the bombers. If they don't attend classes, they get a 'D' and it's back home baby.
6) The US will make a strong effort to become self-sufficient energy wise. This will include developing nonpolluting sources of energy but will require a temporary drilling of oil in the Alaskan wilderness. The caribou will have to cope for a while.
7) Offer Saudi Arabia and other oil producing countries $10 a barrel for their oil. If they don't like it, we go someplace else. They can go somewhere else to sell their production. (About a week of the wells filling up the storage sites would be enough.)
8) If there is a famine or other natural catastrophe in the world, we will not 'interfere.' They can pray to Allah or whomever, for seeds, rain, cement or whatever they need. Besides most of what we give them is stolen or given to the army. The people who need it most get very little, if anything.
9) Ship the UN Headquarters to an isolated island someplace. We don't need the spies and fair weather friends here. Besides, the building would make a good homeless shelter or lockup for illegal aliens.
10) All Americans must go to charm and beauty school. That way, no one can call us 'Ugly Americans' any longer. The Language we speak is ENGLISH...learn it...or LEAVE...Now, isn't that a winner of a plan?
'The Statue of Liberty is no longer saying 'Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses.' She's got a baseball bat and she's yelling, 'YOU WANT A PIECE OF ME!!!!!?' '
